Dear Summer....

Sorry folks, I took yesterday off. I'm a slacker I know. I apologize. I probably lost half of my daily viewers so make sure you tell at least two people about my blog so I can get some folks back.

Today we're going to do the Top 10 Things I Hate About Summer. I know what you're saying, "Its summer, the best time of the year. You can't hate." Well shut up and read...

10.) Extreme heat. Theres a point where its just too hot. Thats when you sit in the house with the corona and make your own corona commercial.

9.) Women who wear short shorts and shouldn't. Don't mean to be an ass...but some of yall don't need to show your ass. Literally and figuratively.

8.) Baseball. Unfortunately, I'm just not a fan. I'm a bandwagon-er. Go Marlins. But don't ask me to come to the game and hang out. I'll go to the bar with you though

7.) Rain on BBQs. Just a lose lose situation. BBQs need sun. Can't have em in the rain. And its the biggest let down when you plan to hit the BBQ and then it just rains on your ribs/hamburger/potato salad parade.

6.) Wack songs. Every since Jay retired everyone keeps trying to have that song for the summer. In their haste they release wack songs. Like Jay said, "You can't force the music"

5.) Summer school. Granted I never went against my own free will, I feel bad for all the kids that have to. As if school during the year wasn't depressing enough.

4.) Fake azz body buidlers. Look, we know you swole. We know you spent nine months in the gym so for 3 months you can walk round in your wife beater making us normal guys look bad. Put on a t-shirt and save that for the beach.

3.) Bugs. Summer brings out the mosquitoes and a variety of random bugs that tend to invade the much needed BBQs.

2.) Beaches in states that are not Florida. I'm sorry, in Chicago, those are not beaches. You have a huge lake. If it ain't ocean it aint a beach. And if it aint Florida, it aint even a beach worth going to.

1.) And the number 1 thing I hate....everyone talking about "get right for the summer". What's so different about summer than the rest of the year? Just because its summer you're allowed to go wild, add another 20 jumpoffs to the list....wait a minute...scratch that...get right for the summer it is.


Feel free to add anything else